Tag: Poor Cash.

Bed, marry, kill for Cash with Slim, Red, and OG Papyrus, pretty please.

itsladykit:

Cash leaned forward, smirking as he surveyed them. “alright. make your pitch.”

Papyrus blinked. “UM…WHAT?”

“you heard me. make your pitch—sell yourself. tell me what you can offer me.”

Unimpressed, Red cupped one hand over his pubic bone and thrust, lifting the other with his middle finger extended. “oh, i got sumthin’ fer you alright—“

“kill,” Cash said, pointing at him. “and? what about you two?”

Slim actually looked a little hurt, and Papyrus looked offended. He crossed his arms over his chest. “YOU KNOW, GREEDY-ME, I DON’T THINK I CARE FOR YOUR ATTITUDE—“

“kill,” Cash said, getting an indignant huff in reply. He smirked, surveying Slim. “guess you’re the lucky one, love—bedded and wedded.”

Slim looked at Papyrus and Red, then shook his head. “no thanks.”

Cash blinked. “what?”

Slim wrapped an arm over Papyrus’ shoulders and knuckled the top of Red’s head. “i think i’ll be happier with these two.” Cash sputtered as they walked off.

“w-what!? you can’t—that’s not how the game is played!”

Red only offered up another lewd gesture in response.

for f,m,k do cash with cash, cash and cash

The three skeletons sitting on Cash’s sofa all bore such striking resemblance to him, that he had no choice but to regard with them with complete, unreserved disgust. Pinching his nasal ridge, he sighed. “fine. alright. i guess we’re doing this.”

Stepping forward, he examined them, sockets narrowed. “well, first–i’d fuck all of you, just to see how good i was in bed.”

“why all of us?” the one on the left asked. “wouldn’t you only need to test one of us?”

“i’m minimising room for error, you idiot,” Cash snapped. “and once i was done with you, i’d kill you all.”

The middle Cash blinked, raising a brow-bone. “but, who would ya marry?” he asked.

“i’m already fucking stuck with myself for the rest of my life–i don’t need three more version of me around.”

There were general mutterings of agreement.

Here, @paintys-actual-art, have some shitpost angst. From this F/M/K meme. Feel free to send me characters!